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Have you ever started a new relationship that seemed just perfect--the one you've been waiting for--and then seemingly out of the blue, it all starts to go bad? If so, you're not alone. We're guessing you, like most of us, want a healthy, successful relationship with a caring loving partner. Once you find that person and begin the relationship, the very first thing you might want to do is learn how to maintain it for a lifetime. A big mistake many people make is to believe that when you first start a new intimate relationship, you should become one with the other person. Read on to find out seven tips that will help you sustain your special "ME" and not just become a "WE.'

To create happy, satisfying relationships, it is imperative that you do everything you can to look after your own individual spirit. You are a vital element of every relationship you are a part of. Your personal desires, values, and dreams are unique and enhance every relationship you enter into and you enhance them only the way YOU can. If you believe that when you begin a new relationship you should develop all the same wants and desires that your partner has, you will miss much of what a truly loving relationship can offer.

Whether you're just starting out in a new relationship or have been with your present partner for many years, supporting and eliciting everyone's unique qualities is a common challenge.

Often, couples who spend much of their time together, feel a sense of loneliness or intense loss when they're not with the other person. This is a sign that you're beginning to lose yourself in the relationship. When you make your own personal dreams, values, and desires as important as the other persons, you retain your sense of self. And the best part is that by maintaining your own essence, you are much more able to create and maintain a healthy, happy relationship when you are together:

Here are seven tips for nurturing and maintaining you're your unique sense of self:

1. Make time for reading. Read books that keep your attention, or just make you feel good. If there has been a particular book you've been waiting to read, take a few minutes now and mark out the time in your calendar to read it. Peaceful time at home, taking pleasure in a good book without any disturbances can make you feel great and bring new energy into your relationship.

2. Go places--somewhere you have wanted to go, but haven't because you were the only one that had an interest. You could go to the theater, or see a movie that you've wanted to see, visit that museum with the interesting exhibit, or register for the course that you've been thinking about taking. Don't wait; you owe it to yourself.

3. Visit family. Sharing time with your loved ones supports you in keeping and maintaining strong relationships. Often, when we get into a new romantic relationship, we overlook our family and forget to take the time to visit. Sound family relationships give us a sense of belonging that stays with us whether we're in a romantic relationship or not.

4. Hang out with your friends; get out and do things with them. Having good friends is a gift and also helps you to relax and be yourself.

5. Don't stop doing what you enjoy. If you're a sculptor and your partner's not, don't stop sculpting. If you like to go to the movies, go! Just because you're a couple now is no reason to stop doing everything you enjoy doing because you're partner isn't interested. If it's something you liked before you were a couple, it's a pretty safe bet you still will.

6. Pamper yourself! Enjoy a bubble bath or whirlpool. Or get a massage. Make yourself feel good and get re-energized for the next time you and your partner are together.

7. Discover what's deeply important to you. The fastest way to nurture yourself is to pinpoint what you value. When you do this, you are able to give to yourself and to your relationship from a much deeper and more authentic place. Be our guests and download our free values worksheet. You can download it when you visit our website. On completion of the exercise, make a list of the things you can do that will help you to have more of what you value in your life. Next time you are feeling lonely, get out your list and do something on it.

A happy, satisfying relationship requires as much time for you, as it does time together. Be sure to make time for both.